Lesson # 3 : Life is too short to waste time hating anyone (or anything).
Another thing I had to work hard on, seriously. The word HATE is so easy to mouth right?
I hate the weather.
I hate my hair today.
I hate getting stuck in traffic when I'm in a rush!
I hate my teacher for giving me so much homework.
I hate the food in _______.
I hate him because he's such a pr*ck!
To some people, the word's part of their everyday vocabulary. Guilty! But like they say, age does certain things to you that you can't explain. It mellows you, for one. That's what it's done to me. I've come a long way from my war freak days (ask my best friends). I was never physically violent, but my passionate nature led me into the most embarrassing (in retrospect) situations I can now laugh so hard about. Back then though, my feistiness and short-temper were things I was truly proud of.
Because I'm really really passionate about things, I'd also very quickly feel hatred towards things or people. If something didn't work right, I'd hate it and never use it again. If someone did me wrong - intentionally or otherwise - I'd hate that person and write him/her off my list. Sure, I still do that nowadays. I know a lot of people do the same. But the word HATE and the intense feelings that go with it are quite a thing of the past already. Again, I truly believe it's a combination of age plus all the lessons life has taught me so far.
LIFE'S TOO SHORT
I sure know what this means now. When you're told you have cancer, it automatically changes everything. Everything! My Mom told me that an illness is a real catalyst. It can change your life instantly. Your outlook, your mentality, your attitude --- it just turns everything around. This is what the cancer has done. Fortunately for me, regardless of the difficulty, I didn't allow the cancer to change me into a monster. I'm not saying I turned into a saint (that just sounds so funny). The cancer has given me the opportunity to see life differently and, therefore, see everything else with fresh eyes. Yes, fresh and not jaded. I may have been given cancer, but along with it came the most amazing transformations!
DO I STILL HATE?
I'll be totally honest. Of course I still do, especially when I'm not in the best of moods. But the difference is knowing when to hate and when not to, versus hating everything most of the time. When I do, I make sure I don't dwell on the negative feeling for too long. This is 'cause I've learned that it takes too much out of you. It's emotionally draining and it affects everyone around you because it'll show. I don't want to be a walking time bomb. This is exactly what you become when you fill yourself with negative thoughts and feelings. When you learn not to hate or hate a lot less than you normally do, you'll find that it's liberating, it makes you feel a lot lighter.
My emotional well-being is really so important to me right now. I recognize the need to be positive and to not focus on the cancer. Do I hate the cancer? I definitely don't love it, but I don't think I can say I ever hated it or I ever will. It's still not my friend, but even if that's the case, it's also given me so much that I should be thankful for. If only for that, I won't hate it.
Good night everyone, I hope you all had an uneventful day. Except for an unexpected blood test (Serum FSH), mine was.
I hate the weather.
I hate my hair today.
I hate getting stuck in traffic when I'm in a rush!
I hate my teacher for giving me so much homework.
I hate the food in _______.
I hate him because he's such a pr*ck!
To some people, the word's part of their everyday vocabulary. Guilty! But like they say, age does certain things to you that you can't explain. It mellows you, for one. That's what it's done to me. I've come a long way from my war freak days (ask my best friends). I was never physically violent, but my passionate nature led me into the most embarrassing (in retrospect) situations I can now laugh so hard about. Back then though, my feistiness and short-temper were things I was truly proud of.
Because I'm really really passionate about things, I'd also very quickly feel hatred towards things or people. If something didn't work right, I'd hate it and never use it again. If someone did me wrong - intentionally or otherwise - I'd hate that person and write him/her off my list. Sure, I still do that nowadays. I know a lot of people do the same. But the word HATE and the intense feelings that go with it are quite a thing of the past already. Again, I truly believe it's a combination of age plus all the lessons life has taught me so far.
LIFE'S TOO SHORT
I sure know what this means now. When you're told you have cancer, it automatically changes everything. Everything! My Mom told me that an illness is a real catalyst. It can change your life instantly. Your outlook, your mentality, your attitude --- it just turns everything around. This is what the cancer has done. Fortunately for me, regardless of the difficulty, I didn't allow the cancer to change me into a monster. I'm not saying I turned into a saint (that just sounds so funny). The cancer has given me the opportunity to see life differently and, therefore, see everything else with fresh eyes. Yes, fresh and not jaded. I may have been given cancer, but along with it came the most amazing transformations!
DO I STILL HATE?
I'll be totally honest. Of course I still do, especially when I'm not in the best of moods. But the difference is knowing when to hate and when not to, versus hating everything most of the time. When I do, I make sure I don't dwell on the negative feeling for too long. This is 'cause I've learned that it takes too much out of you. It's emotionally draining and it affects everyone around you because it'll show. I don't want to be a walking time bomb. This is exactly what you become when you fill yourself with negative thoughts and feelings. When you learn not to hate or hate a lot less than you normally do, you'll find that it's liberating, it makes you feel a lot lighter.
My emotional well-being is really so important to me right now. I recognize the need to be positive and to not focus on the cancer. Do I hate the cancer? I definitely don't love it, but I don't think I can say I ever hated it or I ever will. It's still not my friend, but even if that's the case, it's also given me so much that I should be thankful for. If only for that, I won't hate it.
Good night everyone, I hope you all had an uneventful day. Except for an unexpected blood test (Serum FSH), mine was.
mine was eventful! thank you for the help yesterday :)
ReplyDeleteVery welcome! :)
ReplyDelete